Post 20:
We write our own introductions to our life. You know how every author who has written something great or speaker who has something to share or entrepreneur who has an amazing business idea has this great backstory of the struggles and/or the experience that led them to where they are; we all have one. It just depends on how you choose to introduce yourself.
It was while chatting with a new hockey mom this season that I realized how shitty my introduction was.
HER: So what do you do for a living?
ME: Oh, I just work from home.
HER: Oh, that’s nice.
ME: Yeah, it’s great. So what do you do?
Ugh. As soon as I said it out loud I wanted to palm smash my forehead and ask for a do-over. While I’d like to think the reason I don’t go into a big thing is to be humble and to not have to explain what it is I do because by just naming it, no one understands, but I really thinks it’s how I’ve been conditioned: make it small, no big deal.
Or maybe it is in feeling that I have to give it one noun. What do you do: fill in the blank with the one most important thing you do. I am a teacher. I am a pipefitter. I own this business. I am a mom. See, once you name it with something people understand, the conversation is over. Other than maybe: Where do you work?
Maybe the struggle lies because I don’t want to define myself with just one noun. Maybe what I do or who I am is more than that.
This particular topic has been on my mind as I was listening to a hypothetical scenario between husband and wife.
HUSBAND: … we could move to the same town in Texas as Rachel Hollis and you could get a job with her company.
WIFE: I have zero qualifications to work at her company. I’ve just been at home for the last nine years.
First, both of those statements are false. Second, I know for a fact that this particular woman is currently running her own business and also had a business a few years ago that was super successful – like, I was jealous of how successful it was. I know this woman has training in alternative medicine, which she has natural talent at, and has a gift for oracle card reading. I have no doubt there are more things; I just can’t think of them.
It hurt to hear her say (and believe) she has done nothing for the last nine years. Farther from the truth from my perspective, but I can’t write her introduction.
However you spin your introduction, it’s your truth. I feel like mine could go a few different ways. Hi, my name is Holly. I grew up in a small town in Alberta. I came from a broken home where I felt unloved by my dad. My mom moved around a lot. I got pregnant at 21 and then again at 23 and got married at 24. I’ve had numerous jobs over the last 15 years but never stayed anywhere for very long. Now I work from home part time.
Technically not untrue but paints a certain picture.
Or…
Hi, my name is Holly. I have a university degree in Women’s Studies and attended the Captioning and Court Reporting program at NAIT. I currently co-own two successful businesses both of which are expanding into new and exciting ventures. I have two beautiful children and have been married for 13 years. I have 16 years of project management experience, without obtaining a PMP. In fact, I turned a dying, almost bankrupt project into a debt-free, thriving one. I have a passion for writing and sharing my story.
This introduction is also true.
I have no doubt my introduction is not yet complete and will probably change many times over. I don’t want to be defined by one noun.
This last eight weeks had showed me how much I defined myself by what I do. I went through quite a long period of feeling lost, like I had no purpose. My brain didn’t quite know what to do with who I am is not what I do. If I’m not what I do, then who the f*ck am I? I don’t have an answer yet. In the meantime, I’ll try and write my introduction.
I have two songs on my mind today and I try to just go with whatever pops in my head. For different reasons, I’ve listened to them both in the last little while.
“Name” Goo Goo Dolls
“Everything” Buckcherry
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